Monday, January 30, 2012

After the Pre-Marriage Course.

I attended a pre-marriage course this weekend in TTDI. I'm not getting married any time soon (I think) because I was there to accompany my friend. Her fiancé has already attended the course so I, as usual, am the chosen one to accompany someone's fiancée or wife. (Seriously, leave your girlfriend, fiancée or wife to me and don't worry. I make sure she has a good time without another man. *wriggle eyebrows* I can get testimonials.)

I don't have to gab about what the talks in this course is all about. Go take it yourself. The certificate lasts for a lifetime, although I'm pretty sure a woman kinda has her "expiry date". God knows. :P

But this is what I learned about the young Malay Muslim couples (soon to be young newly-weds):

1 ) Most guys' reason for marriage is to "menghalalkan yang haram dan mendapat kepuasan". And oh how excitedly they admit this.

2) Most girls know the price of gold per 100g. And they want Prada. And SKII.

3) Most couples were shocked to learn that the cost for marriage is roughly RM30000 above.

4) Most guys think it's exciting when the ustaz / ustazah talk about polygamy... and they're not even married yet to the fiancées they accompany to the course.

5) Most girls don't even know that your husbands demands and words are rules and the biggest sin is to go against his wishes. And yes, oral sex must be done to satisfy your husband if you're having your menses.

So in conclusion, most couples don't even realise how big a step they're taking in life AND the hereafter. We Muslims don't say "till death do us part". No. Marriage is a bond that transcends death.

Marry the one you want to enter Jannah with, not the one you want to enter the bedroom with.

Thursday, January 26, 2012


It is strange how the only one who has never given up on me is that one person I never got to have. It is strange how the only one who came to rescue me is the one who've broken my heart the most in the past. It is strange how the only one who thinks I'd make a great wife is the one who is not in love with me.

It is strange how I feel more loved and cared for by this person than by any of those who has ever said those "I love you"s and "I will marry you"s to me.

The absence of promises and lies. The baring of souls between two people who has no secrets left to keep from each other. I think we must've gone through all kinds of deal-breakers in our friendship but no dent is made.

Strange how we can say we know each other so well , yet we know so little of each other's lives. We've never spoken to each other of our families, or our past loves in detail, or our childhood memories.

If by any chance he might stumble upon this and read and recognise himself in these words, I have always had a soft spot for you ever since we first met. I don't know why. I tried not to but it's fated that our paths cross ever so often, we pick up things as if there were no time between our last.

Whatever happens in our future, you know I'll always have your back and I know you're never far away. You are a friend that I care deeply for.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Murmurs turn to beats.

I was born with heart murmurs caused by aortic regurgitation. This was how my heart sounded like. I went through heart surgery at the age of 6 and it's fixed.

Aortic regurgitation means that the pumped blood leaks back into the heart and, in time, the heart grows larger so that it can pump out more blood. According to the doctors, I could've died of big-heartedness by the age of 12. Symptoms are fatigue and weakness, almost life-threatening.

I was born with a defected aortic valve and the only reason the doctors found this out was because I defecated in during labour. That is a distress signal from the baby.

I like to tell people I was "born with a broken heart" and I "went through a lot of shit" to get to live till today.

Alhamdulillah, I have always been a survivor. :)

Thursday, January 12, 2012

30 Day Drawing Challenge - Day 3

My favourite food is petai. Sambal petai ke. Petai celor ke. Fresh petai ke. Couple with budu ke. With tempoyak ke.

Petai is perfection even in its smelliness.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

30 Day Drawing Challenge - Day 2

My favourite animal. 
If you ask this animal what's my favourite band, you'll get the answer.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

30 Day Drawing Challenge - Day 1

I decided to do this 30 Day Drawing Challenge. Let's hope I'm disciplined enough to finish this.

This is Day 1.

I love the moon. I love lines. I dress in basic colours. I wear the hijab. I am trying to reach for the impossible. Or improbable.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Motions and Rest

What I want to do most of the time is drive slowly through quietened cities at ungodly hours with a playlist that makes me want to glide down endless roads. See how the buildings give out a more subdued urban feel, the kind of feeling you get when a paternal figure sings a lullaby in soft tones and deep voice and you can read the protectiveness beneath the strength. The lights, harshly reflected on passing cars, are shy observers that wait for me to go by without a thank you but I can't imagine the city without its yellow-washed midnight glamour.

And someone to sit beside me, static and loyal and familiar, as we move through the emptiness as if we own every single corner of the city. The past, the present, the future, all tossed into this mix of motions and rest.

A love like that. A love like a mix of motions and rest where we are in constant play of gestures and words and situations yet we find, subliminally, the rest we most desperately need within each other. A love like that. I should hope to have.

Friday, January 6, 2012

Oh what have I been up to now...

I crocheted a puff-stitch slouchy beanie in pink and it looks cute!

My mum bought 2 prints from me to give away as wedding gifts. I had to frame them up nicely. The added borders costed me a lot. -__- But I really like how it brings out the lines and colours.

And I made some name-cards. :)

I love my hobbies.

Concrete Love.

I swear I am totally in love with PJ Trade Centre. Yes, the building. Every time I drive past it, I feel like a school girl walking past her crush's classroom. Honestly, I did not expect to love the building this much. Most buildings that impress me on magazine spreads disappoint me in real life.

For instance, Lasalle College of The Arts in Singapore. There was a time where every local or Asian architecture magazine gushed over how beautiful the building is and videos kept popping up with the building as a setting. I couldn't wait to see the building in real life.

Unfortunately, it did not take my breath away. In my opinion, it felt very much like walking through a blown up conceptual model by an architecture student, placed in a space because there happened to be a space.

That did not happen when I visited PJ Trade Centre for the first time. I love the contrast of materials. I love the joints. I love the colours. I love the transparency of its walls. I love the language it speaks.

My students thought I was crazy as I smiled lovingly at the concrete walls and ran my hands over the fair-faced exposed brick walls.

By the way, I stole these photos from their official website.

I can't wait to go there to pay my taxes.

(Oh the smartest subliminal tyranny our government probably unintentionally carried out.)

Monday, January 2, 2012

My granny hobbies consume me.

I have granny hobbies. Yup. I love knitting and crocheting.

Knitted soft wool skinny scarf - RM100

Crocheted slouchy beanie - RM10

Crocheted Red + Black pouch - RM30

Crocheted Black + Red pouch - RM30

Crocheted White + Blue pouch -RM30

Crocheted Blue + White pouch - RM30

All these are available items. Email me if interested : or leave a comment.